Knight Rider: Belated Review

Ah Knight Rider.
A solid staple in any retro fan’s schedule. After reading on the new one’s cancellation, I can’t help but recall when I first saw it and review it once more.

Comic Relief

Oh yes. Every bastard year, Lenny 'cuntbag' Henry and some other loose cabal of fucktards who are about as funny as a freshly vinegared, hacksawed bellend, rolled out for several agonising hours for toadying audiences to pretend to giggle at. It isn't funny. At all.

Neither are all you 'wacky' types who seize upon the whole fucking period to bombard your fucking colleagues and people you believe are friends with your worthless, pointless 'antics' like wearing your clothes inside out or spending the whole day tied to your fucking chair.

Want to do something that will inspire me to gladly give money to charity and upturn the sides of my mouth, in a grimace roughly construed as a smile? Okay, here are some. Push your fucking fat head into a hot wasp's nest, dance around whilst beating the shell of it and spend the whole day being repeatedly stung by the enraged little fuckers. Dip your whole fucking hand into a bottle of nitric acid. Deliberately run out into the path of a speeding locomotive. Kneel down and allow your work colleagues a running smack at the back of your skull with a heavy spade. Eat a plateful of food that has been contaminated with botulinum and Ebola. Crash the bridge of your nose every six seconds with a house brick. These generous activities will undoubtedly raise trillions of bucks for starving kids in Africa, or perpetuate tribal feuds, civil wars, ethnic slaughter and primitive warlords grip on the local economies...whichever belief your guilt-pangs subscribe to.